Parents have the opportunity to influence the world through children. But hold on there – not in the way many of us thought.

Are you able to influence your child enough to control his actions?

 Nope and you never will.

Are you able to influence your child enough to stop her from following the wrong leaders?

Nope, and you never will. 

Are you able to influence your child enough to prevent him from making bad decisions?

Nope, and you never will.

So where’s the opportunity?

You can influence her enough to think for herself and to live her life according to her personal values.

That’s it and that’s enough.

The Peacemaker Parent is a book I wrote so that you can stop trying to win an unwinnable game. You’ll never win the control-and-stop game because it is impossible. Rather than funnel your love, creativity, passion, and energy into this dead end, use your resources to teach your child how to think for herself and then empower her as she practices now, in the safe environment that you create.

I’m a parent who found a way to create the environment necessary for my children to benefit from my ultimate message. The environment supported all of us as we tried new ideas and evaluated results. My ultimate message is that thinking for oneself is vital for happiness.

Let’s think about the packaging for a minute.                      

1.       How can a parent package this valuable message? 

By modeling it every single day.

2.       How can a parent structure practice that’s meaningful enough for the benefits to be recognized by her children?

Allow your children total control over a personal task.

3.       How can you support the inevitable mistakes everyone makes when learning something new and still feel safe and confident?

  Select the right tasks and use “training wheels.”

With few exceptions, regardless your starting point or the developmental abilities of your child, you can influence him or her enough to become an independent leader one day.

The starting point is you

This book is for you, the adult. This book is not about telling you how to parent your children. Remember, even if I thought I had all the right answers (which I certainly don’t think so) I’m only going to be able to influence you enough to think about your choices independently.

That’s it and that’s enough

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Peacemaker Coach is a Scarsdale, New York coaching practice lead by Lorraine Esposito  working with clients from all over the U.S. (Texas, Florida, Connecticut, New York, New Jersey, Washington, DC., North Carolina, Boston, Maine, Colorado, and more) and even into Europe (France and Sweden.)